Update!
This is a late post – and update – but given the time between I have been able to collect my thoughts about this subject into a more concise statement. On September 18th of 2021, after our inaugural seminar with Professor Caio Terra, I unexpectedly received by Black Belt from Professor Caio.
The Black Belt – Everything and Nothing
The Black Belt. It means nothing, yet it means everything. My Jiu-Jitsu will not magically improve overnight. I will still fail, as often as ever. I will sometimes be submitted by hungry and competitive lower belts. I will remain ignorant of many positions, techniques, and movements. I will still be on the mats teaching, training, and learning every single day, just like I was before this promotion. I will largely remain the same instructor and student as I was before.
Professor Caio has said, “if I won the lottery today, you would see me on the mats tomorrow.” Similarly, if I was never subject to promotion – even if i never improved in Jiu-Jitsu – I would still train every single day. Jiu-Jitsu is intrinsically rewarding in a physical, emotional, and spiritual way that no belt could ever compensate for. In that sense, this Black Belt doesn’t mean much.
Recognition
However, I’ve dedicated the better part of 18 years of my life to Jiu-Jitsu. I have had the immense privilege and opportunity to have been training and teaching the art that I truly feel saved my life. Throughout these 18 years I’ve suffered debilitating injuries that have taken me off the mats for cumulative years. I have poured an incredible amount of time, energy, thought, and passion into this endeavor. The phrase “blood, sweat, and tears” applies more to Jiu-Jitsu than perhaps any other sport or art. It is incredibly difficult, both physically and emotionally. Just when you feel like you have a hold on things, another weakness presents itself for you to work on. It is an art of constant struggle, failure, and growth. Receiving a Black Belt doesn’t change that, but it is a recognition of ones devotion, knowledge, ability, attitude, ethics, and contribution to the art.
Subsequently, being recognized as a legitimate representative of Jiu-Jitsu by being promoted to Black Belt means everything to me. It is a validation of all of the time, effort, and pain invested in training and teaching this art. It is a recognition of the hours I have spent sharing Jiu-Jitsu with others, which has always been my main goal; working to build my academy and reach as many people as I can.
Against Hubris
Yet the Black Belt isn’t some sort of endpoint, and it certainly isn’t a carte blanche. I have never felt ready for any of my promotions and have always struggled to feel I deserve them. However (as is often said), when we are promoted isn’t our choice. I have always trusted my Professor. If I didn’t trust my Professor implicitly, I would no longer train under them. I would seek out a different Professor whom I trusted and whose values reflected my own. Each promotion we are given, we must trust that we are ready for. Often I have felt that each promotion gives me the opportunity to grow into, to rise to the occasion. A new belt is always a great impetus that lit a fire under me; motivating me to live up to the expectations of my Professor and to be a legitimate, honorable, and accurate representative of their Jiu-Jitsu and of the art and culture of Jiu-Jitsu in general.
A Beginning Without End
Most Black Belts will tell you that they didn’t truly begin to understand Jiu-Jitsu until they got their Black Belt; that it was a new beginning. That is how I am approaching the Black Belt. Not with an arrogant confidence, but with extreme humility and gratitude. To have the privilege of training and teaching Jiu-Jitsu at this level and to be an ambassador of the art and a representative of my Professor, Caio Terra. I truly look forward to training, teaching, and learning Jiu-Jitsu for the rest of my life.
Here’s to endless growth, and new beginnings! See you all on the mats soon!